Monday, January 31, 2005
kie i'm feelin bad. dun ask.
i dunnoe. why.
why he kant forget so easily n move on.
with a new gurl in mind.
i hate this feeling.
i wanna to cry.
i dunnoe. why.
why he kant forget so easily n move on.
with a new gurl in mind.
i hate this feeling.
i wanna to cry.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
9:20 PM
9:20 PM
um. gee. i'm home early! so happi.
=p dunnoe olso la.
i feel bored.
i rather rush to work again.
at least got thing to do unlike now lol.
-stress-
dun feel like doin my tutorials though.
later ba.
who cares anyway lol
=p
haha. tmr there's onli chem. tink tonight can finish
both sci ba. chem n physics lol.
um. ydae i was nuts.
i stayed at rotiboy from morning till
eh night? haha. without resting lol.
yeppie.
jason bought bread for me la.
so no worries.
haha
i'm wondering wad if one day i like jason.
oppz. =p
haha
since he treats me so so well. haha
but yah. doubt that day will come ba.
heh. i hope he's alright lol.
i know he ver stressed lol.
in work. but take it easy kie darling?
boss are liddat one got choice but to ren ba.
um. hey i'm wondering how wor.
i'm considering withdrawing from college.
eh dun worrie onli for first three months la.
yah since i dun seem to enjoy anything at all wad.
so yah. onli like working lol. n working =p i tink i'm nuts.
um. last day of the month le. so fast its one month n 3 days since we broke up.
yah. its one month n six days since i met him.
its ten more days to our third month if we're still together.
gee. this is bad. i still miss him.
she adjusted her mind as she did every morning, to the fact that the dreams of him and her being together which had stayed on her mind for the past few mths were just dreams. she's trying..
=p dunnoe olso la.
i feel bored.
i rather rush to work again.
at least got thing to do unlike now lol.
-stress-
dun feel like doin my tutorials though.
later ba.
who cares anyway lol
=p
haha. tmr there's onli chem. tink tonight can finish
both sci ba. chem n physics lol.
um. ydae i was nuts.
i stayed at rotiboy from morning till
eh night? haha. without resting lol.
yeppie.
jason bought bread for me la.
so no worries.
haha
i'm wondering wad if one day i like jason.
oppz. =p
haha
since he treats me so so well. haha
but yah. doubt that day will come ba.
heh. i hope he's alright lol.
i know he ver stressed lol.
in work. but take it easy kie darling?
boss are liddat one got choice but to ren ba.
um. hey i'm wondering how wor.
i'm considering withdrawing from college.
eh dun worrie onli for first three months la.
yah since i dun seem to enjoy anything at all wad.
so yah. onli like working lol. n working =p i tink i'm nuts.
um. last day of the month le. so fast its one month n 3 days since we broke up.
yah. its one month n six days since i met him.
its ten more days to our third month if we're still together.
gee. this is bad. i still miss him.
she adjusted her mind as she did every morning, to the fact that the dreams of him and her being together which had stayed on her mind for the past few mths were just dreams. she's trying..
--lemme be your guardian angel--
6:14 PM
6:14 PM
Saturday, January 29, 2005
um -yawnz-
i'm so tired lol. slept like a piggy ydae nite lol.
um had so mani different dreams lol.
eh he's inside olso. but i tink thats becoz i was talking abt him last nite.
yah. eh. was talking to josiah lol. den yah.
he super ke ai one. he's actually so proud that he two-timed his gf.
n is not ONCE but TWICE lol. OMG! =/ den she super forgiving lol.
den he say prove that she's very serious abt the relationship.
i olso very serious wad. but why all liddat one leh.
missing someone is so xin ku.
hai. den got to know some news that he might have another gurl in mind le.
that hurts lol. though i already told myself to let go.
but i still kant bring myself to do so.
till now la. i realli miss him like crazee.
yijie dear ask me to onli tink of him for 15 mins per day.
but that 15 mins always end up spliting up one lol.
-sadx-
i juz kant stopped myself from doin so one ba.
i dunnoe la. =x whatever. its not like he will care a not rite.
mebbie i'm juz not suited to be a relationship ba.
i guess that's GOD"s will lol. so yes. i miss him. i haven meet him since xmas.
hoping to see him soon. realli. by cNY i hope? but chances are realli slim ba.
missing you always.
i'm so tired lol. slept like a piggy ydae nite lol.
um had so mani different dreams lol.
eh he's inside olso. but i tink thats becoz i was talking abt him last nite.
yah. eh. was talking to josiah lol. den yah.
he super ke ai one. he's actually so proud that he two-timed his gf.
n is not ONCE but TWICE lol. OMG! =/ den she super forgiving lol.
den he say prove that she's very serious abt the relationship.
i olso very serious wad. but why all liddat one leh.
missing someone is so xin ku.
hai. den got to know some news that he might have another gurl in mind le.
that hurts lol. though i already told myself to let go.
but i still kant bring myself to do so.
till now la. i realli miss him like crazee.
yijie dear ask me to onli tink of him for 15 mins per day.
but that 15 mins always end up spliting up one lol.
-sadx-
i juz kant stopped myself from doin so one ba.
i dunnoe la. =x whatever. its not like he will care a not rite.
mebbie i'm juz not suited to be a relationship ba.
i guess that's GOD"s will lol. so yes. i miss him. i haven meet him since xmas.
hoping to see him soon. realli. by cNY i hope? but chances are realli slim ba.
missing you always.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
10:45 AM
10:45 AM
Thursday, January 27, 2005
yeah man. i'm home early for once lol =p
but yah haha. eh i now need to rush off soon le lol. sorrie
oppz. heh. coz yah i got work lol. at five. tink i'm gonna be late.
this is bad lol. -faints-
haha =p hmm workload i'm still coping well la.
my class not that bad lol.
juz that till now i still can find a sense of belongin ba.
dunnoe why olso.
but who cares rite.
lala. =p adrian if you happen to be reading this.
thanks ah =p haha. i'll be fine. i wont do silly things one.
dun worry lol. yeah manz.
though yah now i'm still not that cheerful yet la.
like everyone say time will heal all wounds.
yah rite.
we'll see kie.
bleah. haha =p
gee. i miss my cousins.
its been a long while since i see them le wor.!
haha one of these days muz go out or sth lol
sian haha. i'm like so busy with school n work lol.
i'm pro.
yep. coz i did all this with GOD's strength lol
i tink i rawk. nope is GOD rawk.
gee. dunnoe ba i promise i wont tink kie.
yeah man.
eh oh. to that someone out there i doubt you'll read this too..
its not him that i'm referring anyway.
eh dun avoid me lol like no use one lol.
since we like take 3 subjects the same one.
den i kip meeting you for lectures de.
wont it be much much better if we kinda of smile n say hi or sth?
i dunnoe la. hai. i pray you wont treat me liddat please.
but yah haha. eh i now need to rush off soon le lol. sorrie
oppz. heh. coz yah i got work lol. at five. tink i'm gonna be late.
this is bad lol. -faints-
haha =p hmm workload i'm still coping well la.
my class not that bad lol.
juz that till now i still can find a sense of belongin ba.
dunnoe why olso.
but who cares rite.
lala. =p adrian if you happen to be reading this.
thanks ah =p haha. i'll be fine. i wont do silly things one.
dun worry lol. yeah manz.
though yah now i'm still not that cheerful yet la.
like everyone say time will heal all wounds.
yah rite.
we'll see kie.
bleah. haha =p
gee. i miss my cousins.
its been a long while since i see them le wor.!
haha one of these days muz go out or sth lol
sian haha. i'm like so busy with school n work lol.
i'm pro.
yep. coz i did all this with GOD's strength lol
i tink i rawk. nope is GOD rawk.
gee. dunnoe ba i promise i wont tink kie.
yeah man.
eh oh. to that someone out there i doubt you'll read this too..
its not him that i'm referring anyway.
eh dun avoid me lol like no use one lol.
since we like take 3 subjects the same one.
den i kip meeting you for lectures de.
wont it be much much better if we kinda of smile n say hi or sth?
i dunnoe la. hai. i pray you wont treat me liddat please.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
4:31 PM
4:31 PM
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
um haha.
its so late le wor.
no shld be early lol. haha
yep.
went to work juz now. yeah man
hm veri funnie but i'm not tired.
tink of coffee smell.
um. today reach late lol.
den kelvin, my boss not very happy la
oppz. jason in a veri stress mood today.
i dunnoe how to help him lol.
instead like kip adding trouble.
i hope he's alright.
haha but jason didnt scold me.
i feel so bad lol
but its realli not i wanna de lol
ending sch so late like five.
i didnt plan that lol
heh.
i'm tinking of working instead.
i like working lol.
instead of studying but my mum will never allow.
i mean never lol. heh.
um i'm left with my prac graph to do.
kant be bother to touch olso.
realli praise GOD. tmr have no tutorials except physics.
n for that me dunnoe a lot so my teacher wont scold me..
-ponders- not bad ah. =p amen!
heh. no doubt i have always been thinking of him lol.
hm if we're still together ah. haha. he'll
confirm ask me to not work wanna. haha. all my expenses he settle.
i like that haha. but gee. now i'm workin so i wont think?
but hai. he still comes into my mind. every single moment lol.
i realli miss him.
its so late le wor.
no shld be early lol. haha
yep.
went to work juz now. yeah man
hm veri funnie but i'm not tired.
tink of coffee smell.
um. today reach late lol.
den kelvin, my boss not very happy la
oppz. jason in a veri stress mood today.
i dunnoe how to help him lol.
instead like kip adding trouble.
i hope he's alright.
haha but jason didnt scold me.
i feel so bad lol
but its realli not i wanna de lol
ending sch so late like five.
i didnt plan that lol
heh.
i'm tinking of working instead.
i like working lol.
instead of studying but my mum will never allow.
i mean never lol. heh.
um i'm left with my prac graph to do.
kant be bother to touch olso.
realli praise GOD. tmr have no tutorials except physics.
n for that me dunnoe a lot so my teacher wont scold me..
-ponders- not bad ah. =p amen!
heh. no doubt i have always been thinking of him lol.
hm if we're still together ah. haha. he'll
confirm ask me to not work wanna. haha. all my expenses he settle.
i like that haha. but gee. now i'm workin so i wont think?
but hai. he still comes into my mind. every single moment lol.
i realli miss him.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
1:09 AM
1:09 AM
Monday, January 24, 2005
um heh.
why are pple close to my heart leaving me.
gee. i dunnoe why i feel realli lost.
like once i establish this close relationship with that particular someone.
den the person stands to leave me.
i dunnoe why lol. realli feel weird. but then hai
i'm out of control dun have a choice.
heh. first him den now eunice.
both are once so so close to me lol.
but i know both left to fufill that purpose that GOD have put in their life.
one day they'll be back.
but hai. =/ for now can i be sad once?missing them.
work is seriously getting more n more lol.
stress. juz finish my chem tutorial.
halfway lol.
bleah. left two qns haben try
den got two dunnoe how to do.
gee. i tink i'm weird.
now i dun feel like tinking anything le.
hai. juz stuffing myself with work lol.
later i'll try my fmaths tutorial again ba. yah
hm. i found out sth.
i love running.
at least when i run. i wont tink.
i dunnoe. i guess i juz dun wanna to tink.
be it anything lol.
hai. i dunnoe in a dilemma.
hm. considering to join track.
eh i dun run that well la.
but i wanna to join. weird ah. for once lol
i've been missing you since 25.12.04
why are pple close to my heart leaving me.
gee. i dunnoe why i feel realli lost.
like once i establish this close relationship with that particular someone.
den the person stands to leave me.
i dunnoe why lol. realli feel weird. but then hai
i'm out of control dun have a choice.
heh. first him den now eunice.
both are once so so close to me lol.
but i know both left to fufill that purpose that GOD have put in their life.
one day they'll be back.
but hai. =/ for now can i be sad once?missing them.
work is seriously getting more n more lol.
stress. juz finish my chem tutorial.
halfway lol.
bleah. left two qns haben try
den got two dunnoe how to do.
gee. i tink i'm weird.
now i dun feel like tinking anything le.
hai. juz stuffing myself with work lol.
later i'll try my fmaths tutorial again ba. yah
hm. i found out sth.
i love running.
at least when i run. i wont tink.
i dunnoe. i guess i juz dun wanna to tink.
be it anything lol.
hai. i dunnoe in a dilemma.
hm. considering to join track.
eh i dun run that well la.
but i wanna to join. weird ah. for once lol
i've been missing you since 25.12.04
--lemme be your guardian angel--
10:42 PM
10:42 PM
Sunday, January 23, 2005
um haha. its seven more mins to tmr.
bleah. praise GOD man.
i realli thank GOD that mj starts sch on moday at nine lol
woohoo. we rawk haha. bleah.
um. haha. i'm happi.
end of month is coming.
getting my pay soon.
den i can get my new fone.
gee. haha. wonder wad shld i buy.
arHHh.. time is running out.
chinere new year so near. this is bad.
my clothes haven settle..
-ponders-
i where will have time go shop lol.
jialat. bleah.
realli thank GOD that i have the strength to work n study at the same time
amen! =p i love my daddy jesus. lots. -huggies-
i'm putting all my hopes on daddy jesus.
he knows wad i wanna de.
oh did i mention i haben finish my tutorials. but thats becoz.
eh i dunnoe how to do.
realli lost.
wonder how my tutors are goin to react tmr lol
daddy jesus will help me.
i know thaT. AMEN.
gee. was reading seventeen. found this really true.
the love that lasts the longest is the one that is never returned.
dun worrie yijie i'm not thinking anything lol.
yah. for now i'm gonna to juz focus on work n work ba.
i know that day will come. n i have full faith lol
to that someone out dere. its not him la.
you shld know who you are lol.
eh dun tink so much. must take care.
i know you're strong one. jia you kie?
i'll be here no matter wad. -huggies-
i'll forever be missing you. its been 5 weeks n a day seen we last met.
bleah. praise GOD man.
i realli thank GOD that mj starts sch on moday at nine lol
woohoo. we rawk haha. bleah.
um. haha. i'm happi.
end of month is coming.
getting my pay soon.
den i can get my new fone.
gee. haha. wonder wad shld i buy.
arHHh.. time is running out.
chinere new year so near. this is bad.
my clothes haven settle..
-ponders-
i where will have time go shop lol.
jialat. bleah.
realli thank GOD that i have the strength to work n study at the same time
amen! =p i love my daddy jesus. lots. -huggies-
i'm putting all my hopes on daddy jesus.
he knows wad i wanna de.
oh did i mention i haben finish my tutorials. but thats becoz.
eh i dunnoe how to do.
realli lost.
wonder how my tutors are goin to react tmr lol
daddy jesus will help me.
i know thaT. AMEN.
gee. was reading seventeen. found this really true.
the love that lasts the longest is the one that is never returned.
dun worrie yijie i'm not thinking anything lol.
yah. for now i'm gonna to juz focus on work n work ba.
i know that day will come. n i have full faith lol
to that someone out dere. its not him la.
you shld know who you are lol.
eh dun tink so much. must take care.
i know you're strong one. jia you kie?
i'll be here no matter wad. -huggies-
i'll forever be missing you. its been 5 weeks n a day seen we last met.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
11:49 PM
11:49 PM
um woohoo. haha.
i'm tired lol.
juz came back from work.
haha. i wonder how i'm goin to survive lol.
when i'm working n studying.
heh. but i enjoyed working man.
=p haha. i wont tink i suppose. haha
but then i still end up tinking lol.
sianz haix.
um jason say i changed.
eh. for better or worse?
dat i dunnoe ba. haha.
den jason so scared i kant tehan or sth lol
i'm not strong gurl wad.
oh jason's gf was here.
um she ultra nice lol.
wait for him like so long
from 5 plus to nine.
nice rite.
if it's me.
i doubt i will wait.
i will go shop i suppose den wait for his call.
but then again its realli nice to see him work seriously.
um haha. =p esp when he swim ba.
haha thats the past la.
so yah lol.
haha starting tinking of him again.
wonder how he will react if i stood dere n waited for him.
wonder if he'll scold me that so late i'm still up here.
if he's still there. he'll be talking on fone with me. forcing me to sleep.
um. i like his worried face n voice.
when even i didnt eat dinner like today again.
when i'm lacking of sleep.
n i still need to gather my energy to go n look at my tutorials.
heh. no matter how hard i try i kant forget.
coz my heart says no i suppose.
but i dun haf a choice.
it realli hurts.
but den i dun wanna to make things tough for him.
he happi i happi ba.
one person hurt better den two.
i'll wait no matter wad. doubt will have any outcome olso
but he realli means a lot to me.
i miss him. much much more than anything else.
i'll be waiting for that day where i can say
chipmunk n duckie forever.
i'm tired lol.
juz came back from work.
haha. i wonder how i'm goin to survive lol.
when i'm working n studying.
heh. but i enjoyed working man.
=p haha. i wont tink i suppose. haha
but then i still end up tinking lol.
sianz haix.
um jason say i changed.
eh. for better or worse?
dat i dunnoe ba. haha.
den jason so scared i kant tehan or sth lol
i'm not strong gurl wad.
oh jason's gf was here.
um she ultra nice lol.
wait for him like so long
from 5 plus to nine.
nice rite.
if it's me.
i doubt i will wait.
i will go shop i suppose den wait for his call.
but then again its realli nice to see him work seriously.
um haha. =p esp when he swim ba.
haha thats the past la.
so yah lol.
haha starting tinking of him again.
wonder how he will react if i stood dere n waited for him.
wonder if he'll scold me that so late i'm still up here.
if he's still there. he'll be talking on fone with me. forcing me to sleep.
um. i like his worried face n voice.
when even i didnt eat dinner like today again.
when i'm lacking of sleep.
n i still need to gather my energy to go n look at my tutorials.
heh. no matter how hard i try i kant forget.
coz my heart says no i suppose.
but i dun haf a choice.
it realli hurts.
but den i dun wanna to make things tough for him.
he happi i happi ba.
one person hurt better den two.
i'll wait no matter wad. doubt will have any outcome olso
but he realli means a lot to me.
i miss him. much much more than anything else.
i'll be waiting for that day where i can say
chipmunk n duckie forever.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
1:17 AM
1:17 AM
Saturday, January 22, 2005
um wanted to blog ydae. but was so tired after shopping
oppz. haha. went out with mum in the morning.
den went to see my cousin-in-law in thomson.
um. i was born there too kie. haha. yeah man
um saw my niece. so small.
so ke ai.
i like kids.
i wanna to give birth man
oppz thats still early ah =p
um was at the nursery.
didnt wanted to leave lol.
sorrie mel. gee. had to go hospital.
was being forced.
den mum said its too late to go over
hope you guys have fun lol
met yijie ydae too.
um bought earrings lol. yipee.. finally
haha =p den a tank top lol.
nothing much la.
my new year clothes haven settle.
-headaches-
i'll tink of ways man.
later got vega 5 outing.
i hope it will be fun
miss them alot wor.
didnt had chance to spend much time with them.
coz of chicken pox.
but i'm well.
ah-ha. um. i miss workplace pple.
heh. yeah man.
will be back at work by next tues.
lets pray n hope my workload in school isnt that much
gee. alittle impossible.
but with GOD's strength.
i can do it man! =p
my tutorials are a big headache lol
sian. esp fmaths n physics.
i'm still so blur lol. how.
save me. my fmaths tutor is fierce.
scary. die olso muz figure out lol. -stress-
um. i need money man. to shop for clothes.
n i wanna new phone.
its not my fault.
i love my 7250i coz of some stuff in it.
but then its on the verge of breaking down lol
i kant sms that fast lol
i'm laggy. but i dun haf a choice.
i must work for money's sake lol. hai. dunnoe la
is there any way i can transfer stuff from my phone
to the coming new one? -ponders-
haha. whatever. hm.
i miss him. no matter wad. i dunnoe why too
he came into my mind when i'm in the hospital.
when i'm readin seventeen.
when i'm shopping.
when i see the 'pillars'
i realli miss him.
today marks the starting of 5th week not seeing him.
Please
You have the powers to take over my feelings,
Yet you didn’t know you possessed them.
You can make me the happiest person alive
Yet you can make me the saddest person on earth
You can bring me happiness to me
Yet you can also bring tears to my eyes.
You didn’t know you had the powers to do these,
Yet you just continued.
You are one of the many who can make my world spin.
Sometimes you make me so happy,
Yet sometimes you make me so sad,
I just didn’t know how to feel anymore.
Please stop playing with my feelings,
I cannot take these mental tortures.
I don’t have the strength to endure,
My heart is too weak to bear.
Please don’t let me go.
Save me from falling to the ground.
No matter wad I would still be left injured
and hurt in the end.
oppz. haha. went out with mum in the morning.
den went to see my cousin-in-law in thomson.
um. i was born there too kie. haha. yeah man
um saw my niece. so small.
so ke ai.
i like kids.
i wanna to give birth man
oppz thats still early ah =p
um was at the nursery.
didnt wanted to leave lol.
sorrie mel. gee. had to go hospital.
was being forced.
den mum said its too late to go over
hope you guys have fun lol
met yijie ydae too.
um bought earrings lol. yipee.. finally
haha =p den a tank top lol.
nothing much la.
my new year clothes haven settle.
-headaches-
i'll tink of ways man.
later got vega 5 outing.
i hope it will be fun
miss them alot wor.
didnt had chance to spend much time with them.
coz of chicken pox.
but i'm well.
ah-ha. um. i miss workplace pple.
heh. yeah man.
will be back at work by next tues.
lets pray n hope my workload in school isnt that much
gee. alittle impossible.
but with GOD's strength.
i can do it man! =p
my tutorials are a big headache lol
sian. esp fmaths n physics.
i'm still so blur lol. how.
save me. my fmaths tutor is fierce.
scary. die olso muz figure out lol. -stress-
um. i need money man. to shop for clothes.
n i wanna new phone.
its not my fault.
i love my 7250i coz of some stuff in it.
but then its on the verge of breaking down lol
i kant sms that fast lol
i'm laggy. but i dun haf a choice.
i must work for money's sake lol. hai. dunnoe la
is there any way i can transfer stuff from my phone
to the coming new one? -ponders-
haha. whatever. hm.
i miss him. no matter wad. i dunnoe why too
he came into my mind when i'm in the hospital.
when i'm readin seventeen.
when i'm shopping.
when i see the 'pillars'
i realli miss him.
today marks the starting of 5th week not seeing him.
Please
You have the powers to take over my feelings,
Yet you didn’t know you possessed them.
You can make me the happiest person alive
Yet you can make me the saddest person on earth
You can bring me happiness to me
Yet you can also bring tears to my eyes.
You didn’t know you had the powers to do these,
Yet you just continued.
You are one of the many who can make my world spin.
Sometimes you make me so happy,
Yet sometimes you make me so sad,
I just didn’t know how to feel anymore.
Please stop playing with my feelings,
I cannot take these mental tortures.
I don’t have the strength to endure,
My heart is too weak to bear.
Please don’t let me go.
Save me from falling to the ground.
No matter wad I would still be left injured
and hurt in the end.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
9:54 AM
9:54 AM
Thursday, January 20, 2005
um kie haha. =p
on the fone with dan. haha.
talking to him olso loh. yeah man.
-happi- *applause*
hm oh did i mention he's goin back to swimming lol
yeah man. now he can be so happi n carefree lol
he happy i happy ba.
i wish halim will talk to me.
at least i can know his whereabouts but dunno la
haha. i know he wont like it so i dont lol yeah?
i promise not to tink. but i kant -cryz-
i must lol.
i pei xinyun back to ahs today.
haha. i'm nice. to see her dar dar play match.
envious man. but haha. i wont tink.
yah. oh. i met kaixiang at bedok today.
haha. found out he's in vj swimming lol. haha
*surprise*
oh i'm goin shopping tmr lol haha
happi. i'm goin to shop n shop
i want to buy things but i'm broke. sian
tutorials are piling up -stress-
i'm goin to work hard. i wanna to do well.
kip myself occupied. so i wont tink.
i'll stand by you, even if you dont need me, even if you don't care..i just need you to know..i'll stand by you..
on the fone with dan. haha.
talking to him olso loh. yeah man.
-happi- *applause*
hm oh did i mention he's goin back to swimming lol
yeah man. now he can be so happi n carefree lol
he happy i happy ba.
i wish halim will talk to me.
at least i can know his whereabouts but dunno la
haha. i know he wont like it so i dont lol yeah?
i promise not to tink. but i kant -cryz-
i must lol.
i pei xinyun back to ahs today.
haha. i'm nice. to see her dar dar play match.
envious man. but haha. i wont tink.
yah. oh. i met kaixiang at bedok today.
haha. found out he's in vj swimming lol. haha
*surprise*
oh i'm goin shopping tmr lol haha
happi. i'm goin to shop n shop
i want to buy things but i'm broke. sian
tutorials are piling up -stress-
i'm goin to work hard. i wanna to do well.
kip myself occupied. so i wont tink.
i'll stand by you, even if you dont need me, even if you don't care..i just need you to know..i'll stand by you..
--lemme be your guardian angel--
10:06 PM
10:06 PM
TreSUre.AroUnd.Ppl.duN.wAIt.UNITL.reGRET.de
THERE.no.TURNING.bAck.
If.U.REgRET.dei.ALreadY.doNe.My.PArt.
U.aRE.the.oNe.MAke.MI.gET.this.TYPE.of.Life.
SOMeDaY.Or.SOmeHow.UwiLL.know.HOW.I.feel.de.
THERE.no.TURNING.bAck.
If.U.REgRET.dei.ALreadY.doNe.My.PArt.
U.aRE.the.oNe.MAke.MI.gET.this.TYPE.of.Life.
SOMeDaY.Or.SOmeHow.UwiLL.know.HOW.I.feel.de.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
7:24 PM
7:24 PM
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
kie yep. haha. =p
i'm back home after my officially lectures day lol
um kie i still like it. still coping i suppose haha.
i tink i rawkz.. i finish my cg essay.chem tutorial n halfway thru my fmaths one.
um i onli enjoyed fmaths lecture lol. i'm weird. today didnt had any chem.
will c tmr ba. =p haha. yeah manz -rejoices-
mjc is weird man. heh. once you stepped in hoh. eh you'll feel like
studieeeing.. thats weird haha. but i like that
at least i wont tink. woohoo.
haha. met adrian during physics lecture.
um. i miss vega 5 haha. its okie. theres outing on sat.
i hope it turns out well lol. yeah!
haha. oh halim turns out to be in the class besides me.
good or bad?
um. have my lectures with him lol. fmaths n physics.
wonder if chem is the same. woohoo. fun.
haha. eh. haha. =p seeing him makes me tink of him? hai.
whatever i'll stay hyper first. oppz. wonder hows he in innova lol
um. my cg okie la. eh. anglican pple as usual.
met crazee pple. like janice.shihui.sherri.jean.
afew more others.
sorrie short term memory.still coping la. *prays*
oh i studied at e library today with jun kit n wen!
jun kit rockz haha. my OGL lol yeah manz.
super hardworking guy la. muggin lol.
muz jia you kie. thanks =p
um. yay. wen is stressed.
i am olso.
gee. is 3 months supposed to be liddat.
-ponders- i wonder lol
oh my cca haben settle sian.
will settle asap i tink.
yeah man join outdec or sth?
gee. i dunnoe. can i dun join any?
i juz wanna to study.
juz to kip myself occupied. haha.
i love you guys man. mavis you rock kie.
i promise i wont tink so much *huggies*
i'm back home after my officially lectures day lol
um kie i still like it. still coping i suppose haha.
i tink i rawkz.. i finish my cg essay.chem tutorial n halfway thru my fmaths one.
um i onli enjoyed fmaths lecture lol. i'm weird. today didnt had any chem.
will c tmr ba. =p haha. yeah manz -rejoices-
mjc is weird man. heh. once you stepped in hoh. eh you'll feel like
studieeeing.. thats weird haha. but i like that
at least i wont tink. woohoo.
haha. met adrian during physics lecture.
um. i miss vega 5 haha. its okie. theres outing on sat.
i hope it turns out well lol. yeah!
haha. oh halim turns out to be in the class besides me.
good or bad?
um. have my lectures with him lol. fmaths n physics.
wonder if chem is the same. woohoo. fun.
haha. eh. haha. =p seeing him makes me tink of him? hai.
whatever i'll stay hyper first. oppz. wonder hows he in innova lol
um. my cg okie la. eh. anglican pple as usual.
met crazee pple. like janice.shihui.sherri.jean.
afew more others.
sorrie short term memory.still coping la. *prays*
oh i studied at e library today with jun kit n wen!
jun kit rockz haha. my OGL lol yeah manz.
super hardworking guy la. muggin lol.
muz jia you kie. thanks =p
um. yay. wen is stressed.
i am olso.
gee. is 3 months supposed to be liddat.
-ponders- i wonder lol
oh my cca haben settle sian.
will settle asap i tink.
yeah man join outdec or sth?
gee. i dunnoe. can i dun join any?
i juz wanna to study.
juz to kip myself occupied. haha.
i love you guys man. mavis you rock kie.
i promise i wont tink so much *huggies*
--lemme be your guardian angel--
10:34 PM
10:34 PM
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
kie i hope he'll read this.
haiz.i'm a sad case gurl lol.
juz went out to tamp to get sth from my mummy lol.
den ya. i met innova people.
he came into my mind.
thats bad. hai. i dunnoe. am i okay?
i'm feeling weird inside. wad if i meet him with another gurl.
so i penned this down.
I wonder wat’s reali true love
Sometimes it bugs me
And sometimes it doesn't
If oni both u & me wld try....
Partin our ways
A decision we haf decided
Losin u wasn't a choice
It was inevitable....
The hurt is still strong
But i noe i will carry on
No matter where I go
Memories will follow me for long
Tears will stop flowin somedae
I nvr noe when
If seein u again will help,
I rather not see u for fear or
e feelin comin back once more....
Someone I used to love
Someone I used to hold at nite
Someone who used to hug me when I cried
Someone who used to make me smile when I’m dwn
Someone I once loved so much I didn't even realize
Someone I wish I cld hold on forever but I cldn't..
Someone I used to cry over on lonely nite
Someone who gave me so much memories till it fills my mind each nite
Still, he's oni someone I used to love
Still, he's e oni one I reali loved
Still, he will nvr be mine again
But I still love him forever...
I tried so hard to forget
The memories of yesterday still haunts me
I tried to let it go
The images of u fills me so
I tried to walk away
Each step I took was so heavy den
I tried not to look back
Yet, my heart's pullin me back
I tried to hide my tears
Emotions I can't reveal
I tried to make u stay
But still, u chose to walk away
When was e last time I cry?
When was e last time I smile?
Where were u when I needed u?
When was dere ever a time u were here?
I muz haf been a fool
Silly enough to endure all tis while
I cld haf walked away
Yet, e naive me still choose to stay
How long more before I will let go?
How long more shld I wait for u to sae u reali love me so?
How long more will I continue to cry?
For my love for u was ever so real all tis while
Cryin wasn't supposed to be
Mani people told me tis
Tried my best to let go
Yet I am still bearin e pain
In e end, I cried
Did u notice? Haf u realize?
Decision was mine
Choice I've made
Lettin go once & for all
To stop me frm all e pain
How long? How long more?
To forget those memories
So bittersweet ever since tat dae
Be strong till e end
I reali wish I can
No one's dere
Juz me alone bearin all e pain.
I sill love you
haiz.i'm a sad case gurl lol.
juz went out to tamp to get sth from my mummy lol.
den ya. i met innova people.
he came into my mind.
thats bad. hai. i dunnoe. am i okay?
i'm feeling weird inside. wad if i meet him with another gurl.
so i penned this down.
I wonder wat’s reali true love
Sometimes it bugs me
And sometimes it doesn't
If oni both u & me wld try....
Partin our ways
A decision we haf decided
Losin u wasn't a choice
It was inevitable....
The hurt is still strong
But i noe i will carry on
No matter where I go
Memories will follow me for long
Tears will stop flowin somedae
I nvr noe when
If seein u again will help,
I rather not see u for fear or
e feelin comin back once more....
Someone I used to love
Someone I used to hold at nite
Someone who used to hug me when I cried
Someone who used to make me smile when I’m dwn
Someone I once loved so much I didn't even realize
Someone I wish I cld hold on forever but I cldn't..
Someone I used to cry over on lonely nite
Someone who gave me so much memories till it fills my mind each nite
Still, he's oni someone I used to love
Still, he's e oni one I reali loved
Still, he will nvr be mine again
But I still love him forever...
I tried so hard to forget
The memories of yesterday still haunts me
I tried to let it go
The images of u fills me so
I tried to walk away
Each step I took was so heavy den
I tried not to look back
Yet, my heart's pullin me back
I tried to hide my tears
Emotions I can't reveal
I tried to make u stay
But still, u chose to walk away
When was e last time I cry?
When was e last time I smile?
Where were u when I needed u?
When was dere ever a time u were here?
I muz haf been a fool
Silly enough to endure all tis while
I cld haf walked away
Yet, e naive me still choose to stay
How long more before I will let go?
How long more shld I wait for u to sae u reali love me so?
How long more will I continue to cry?
For my love for u was ever so real all tis while
Cryin wasn't supposed to be
Mani people told me tis
Tried my best to let go
Yet I am still bearin e pain
In e end, I cried
Did u notice? Haf u realize?
Decision was mine
Choice I've made
Lettin go once & for all
To stop me frm all e pain
How long? How long more?
To forget those memories
So bittersweet ever since tat dae
Be strong till e end
I reali wish I can
No one's dere
Juz me alone bearin all e pain.
I sill love you
--lemme be your guardian angel--
4:38 PM
4:38 PM
kie this post is supposed to be up ydae at 10.36pm lol but yah quarrelled with my daddy so was banned from the com. small case la. dun ask juz that i cried again lol. bnut not entirely over the quarrel but over.. yah haiz. why everytime olso dun have negotiations one lol. with parents n him olso same case de. hai. i'm not a strong gurl lol. so i need to be loved too. i might portray such an image but hai. i dunnoe. everyone tinks i'm strong but i do break down at times so dun presume that once you made a decision i can take it no matter wad. juz that you dun see it onli.
gee. i dreamt of him again. ultra sweet man! he msg me lol den i super happy. bad rite. dunnoe if is daddy jesus trying to tell me sth? or juz metinking of him too much thats why i wanted so badly to go back to work today coz by tmr i can resume school liaoz lol. i wanna sth to kip myself occupied. n staying at home wont lol. arGH. this is like a cry yet no one heards except daddy jesus lol. i'm realli tired. tired of everything le la. i dun like the feeling of not knowing anything not having any control lol. i dun like the feeling of no giving me a choice. i miss you. its like 4 weeks.3days since i met you.
Hurt
You have been a very big help to me,
Though you do not think so
You do not know that you have helped
In one way or another.
You make me feel the way I have never felt before,
Not even with anyone that I know.
No one had ever make me feel the way I feel now,
No one except you.
You have done things that hurt me,
Yet I just forgave you.
I do believe in second chances,
And hope that you won’t take them for granted.
I do not want to get hurt again.
Though you may not be aware that you have hurt me.
I often wanted to tell you
But afraid of being ignored by you, I just keep mum.
Whenever you ignore me,
I feel as the doors to my happiness are locked
You are the key to my happiness,
Yet you didn’t know,
Please don’t hurt me anymore,
I can’t take it.
I can’t handle the injures that you have left in my heart.
It is just too much for me to bear.
I still love you.
gee. i dreamt of him again. ultra sweet man! he msg me lol den i super happy. bad rite. dunnoe if is daddy jesus trying to tell me sth? or juz metinking of him too much thats why i wanted so badly to go back to work today coz by tmr i can resume school liaoz lol. i wanna sth to kip myself occupied. n staying at home wont lol. arGH. this is like a cry yet no one heards except daddy jesus lol. i'm realli tired. tired of everything le la. i dun like the feeling of not knowing anything not having any control lol. i dun like the feeling of no giving me a choice. i miss you. its like 4 weeks.3days since i met you.
Hurt
You have been a very big help to me,
Though you do not think so
You do not know that you have helped
In one way or another.
You make me feel the way I have never felt before,
Not even with anyone that I know.
No one had ever make me feel the way I feel now,
No one except you.
You have done things that hurt me,
Yet I just forgave you.
I do believe in second chances,
And hope that you won’t take them for granted.
I do not want to get hurt again.
Though you may not be aware that you have hurt me.
I often wanted to tell you
But afraid of being ignored by you, I just keep mum.
Whenever you ignore me,
I feel as the doors to my happiness are locked
You are the key to my happiness,
Yet you didn’t know,
Please don’t hurt me anymore,
I can’t take it.
I can’t handle the injures that you have left in my heart.
It is just too much for me to bear.
I still love you.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
8:45 AM
8:45 AM
Monday, January 17, 2005
hm i juz found out sth realli interesting.. my blogs ydae rite is was at the exact same time kie! =p one is pm n the other am onli. hmmm. realli realli surprise. =p hm. haha. stuck at home for today n tmr den yay =p finally can go back school le. heh. ydae thanks! =p to god-bro. realli for pei-ing me lol haha. hmm. ydae no is this morning at one plus lol. went supper with him lol. n his bro olso dun worry ah. =/ heh. supposed to juz eat lol. but we end up talking lol. den yah. since i very very LONG. nve talk to him le. as in heart to heart lol. so yah. thanks. you better feel much kie! jia you. you can do it lol. i have faith in you n her k..
um. sian. dunnoe la. talked to angel.. thanks angel. tsktsk. =p yah. i'm feeling better le la. haha. i'm moving on lol dun worry. gimme time k. realli i can do it . i will do it. no i must do it. i'll try n do it lol. i'm trying but i dunnoe!! arGH. thats bad. haha. sorrie angel you ask me type sth positive yet i didnt oppz. gee. dunnoe la.
Love
When I was scared, you are beside me
Holding on me as tight as you could
Afraid of losing me one day
You showered me with your love.
Your love was real
Unlike the ones I have encountered
Not playing with my feelings,
You tell me things that you really mean
You make me the happiest person
Without knowing how much you have done
Thinking that you have not done enough
You always think of ways to please me
Your way of pleasing me
Is too much for me to bear
Now you tell me that you want to leave
Make my heart shatter into million of pieces
Why do you have to do this to me?
Only you know the answers
The answers are all found in one place
Your heart and no one else’s
um. sian. dunnoe la. talked to angel.. thanks angel. tsktsk. =p yah. i'm feeling better le la. haha. i'm moving on lol dun worry. gimme time k. realli i can do it . i will do it. no i must do it. i'll try n do it lol. i'm trying but i dunnoe!! arGH. thats bad. haha. sorrie angel you ask me type sth positive yet i didnt oppz. gee. dunnoe la.
Love
When I was scared, you are beside me
Holding on me as tight as you could
Afraid of losing me one day
You showered me with your love.
Your love was real
Unlike the ones I have encountered
Not playing with my feelings,
You tell me things that you really mean
You make me the happiest person
Without knowing how much you have done
Thinking that you have not done enough
You always think of ways to please me
Your way of pleasing me
Is too much for me to bear
Now you tell me that you want to leave
Make my heart shatter into million of pieces
Why do you have to do this to me?
Only you know the answers
The answers are all found in one place
Your heart and no one else’s
--lemme be your guardian angel--
10:34 AM
10:34 AM
Sunday, January 16, 2005
gee. haha. yi jie ask me to blog so yah lol =p i so guai listen to her lol.. wonder if she'll see this la =p kie i wanna to go shoppin man. parents n sis went to shop without me!! hmph. unfair. stupid chicken pox.. den adrian started calling me pox-ious lol. sian haha. but on second thot like very ke ai wor. haha. oppz but who cares anyway haha. i so hyper today lol..hmm tink got sth to do with eh mummy letting me out for one hour today! so happy though is juz went to meet wen n fatima to copy my chen notes la. but yah lol. better den staying at home for the third day so now i have stayed at home for 144+23 hours lol thats hmm 167 hours! haha so much lol. tmr having vega 5 meeting in morning but i kant go.. all the stupid chicken pox fault la. haha.hopefully it ends asap man.i miss school lol.seriously for once ah.=p haha.oh i starting to like taufik's version de i dream but onli that song. i still like sly more . *stick tongue* haha. so too bad. haha. no my daddy jesus is much better! =p haha. he supports me no matter wad.. he have been walking with me for so mani years already.. thanks daddy.! =p haha. like for instance tis week couldnt attend church or cell but could feel the presence of my cell gen 7 with me lol. haha. thank you daddy jesus.! i love him more than anything lol. so for his sake i'm goin to move on n walk on. dun worry. to that someone out there. i realli prayed for GOD's blessings on you kie. never let go HIS hand.HE'll always be there for you. it might be a tough period of you to start everything again but dun worry. you got HIM n me =p i realli miss your presence lol but i'm trusting GOD that you'll hold on. n i'll wait no matter wad.
Broken-hearted
You told me that you loved me
Yet you lied, or didn’t you
I really don’t know
I wish you could tell me
How you are feeling inside
I took our relationship seriously
Did you take it seriously as well?
Only you would know.
I treasured the time together with all my heart
I hoped you did too.
I am your girlfriend
Yet I feel that I am not
Maybe I am being sensitive
Or maybe what I feel is true
I hope this is not the end of our relationship
You liked someone else
Yet you did not know
You don’t know if you like someone else
With this statement
Isn’t it obvious that you do?
Why do you have to lie to me?
Can you please explain?
I need to know and I need to know now
I cannot wait for I have no patience
I cannot bear to leave you either.
You are juz too special for me to leave
I loved you with all my heart
And now you broke it with simple actions
Am I really that easy to cheat
Or is that just your character?
Broken-hearted
You told me that you loved me
Yet you lied, or didn’t you
I really don’t know
I wish you could tell me
How you are feeling inside
I took our relationship seriously
Did you take it seriously as well?
Only you would know.
I treasured the time together with all my heart
I hoped you did too.
I am your girlfriend
Yet I feel that I am not
Maybe I am being sensitive
Or maybe what I feel is true
I hope this is not the end of our relationship
You liked someone else
Yet you did not know
You don’t know if you like someone else
With this statement
Isn’t it obvious that you do?
Why do you have to lie to me?
Can you please explain?
I need to know and I need to know now
I cannot wait for I have no patience
I cannot bear to leave you either.
You are juz too special for me to leave
I loved you with all my heart
And now you broke it with simple actions
Am I really that easy to cheat
Or is that just your character?
--lemme be your guardian angel--
11:47 PM
11:47 PM
um haha. i tink i broke record le. haha. for myself la. eh. i stayed at home for six days le.. thats 144 hours le! woah. haha. haben include today le .yah . *applause* i'm pro man. hmm. lala. i wrote five kind of poems la. eh quite touching i hope but all sad ending .. i shall post one evry day k.. den c when i got time den i write more but muz have the mood la.. so yah .. oppz haha.. is actualli a story of the both of us la.. but haha. i didnt put in sequence lol.. hmm.. some parts irrelevant olso la.. but this is my fav lol..
Mixed feelings
On the days when we are together,
I wish that time would freeze.
On the days when we are apart,
I wish for time to hurry.
You are a special person to me,
No matter what people think of you
You make life seem so enjoyable
Whenever we are together.
Whenever we are together,
I feel as if I am on cloud nine.
Whenever we are apart,
I feel lonely and left alone.
I treasure the time we spent together,
Every moment of the seconds spent.
Whenever I am close to you,
My heart seems to beat faster.
Every time I am with you, I do not want to leave
As I am afraid I won’t get a chance to see you again.
Thinking about losing you,
Makes my mood turn blue.
So now you know how special you are to me?
I cannot imagine if one day you will like another girl.
It is very much possible.
Yet I do not want to think about it.
Mixed feelings
On the days when we are together,
I wish that time would freeze.
On the days when we are apart,
I wish for time to hurry.
You are a special person to me,
No matter what people think of you
You make life seem so enjoyable
Whenever we are together.
Whenever we are together,
I feel as if I am on cloud nine.
Whenever we are apart,
I feel lonely and left alone.
I treasure the time we spent together,
Every moment of the seconds spent.
Whenever I am close to you,
My heart seems to beat faster.
Every time I am with you, I do not want to leave
As I am afraid I won’t get a chance to see you again.
Thinking about losing you,
Makes my mood turn blue.
So now you know how special you are to me?
I cannot imagine if one day you will like another girl.
It is very much possible.
Yet I do not want to think about it.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
11:47 AM
11:47 AM
Saturday, January 15, 2005
gee. this is fun.. is n mid month of jan already.. that olso implies i can be back in school in 3 more days.. you know why i dun like staying at home.. it makes my thots run wild n i dun like that feeling.. at least when i'm studying or working there's sth for me to work on lol. =p hmm.. i told myself to gave up i kant lol. haha. but i wont force it liaoz lah. goin to leave things as it is lol. no use trying to force it since he might not be happy wad. but i do prayed n hoped i wont see him on the streets with another gurl. gee.my heart will break on the spot man. =/ for now i'm goin to just focus on studies.frenzs.GOD.. dunoe why starting to feel i'm drfiting away from GOD lol. its been a long while since i sat there during quiet time n i teared .. guess i have been putting too much attenetion on him. =p GOD's jealouus. ah-ha. so right now i'm goin to focus on him more. everything is in GOD's hands so why bothering forcing it lol. heh. to that someone. dun tink so much kie. he's not worth your friendship then. move on. got me rmb? haha. i myself trying to get out of it la so yah lol. let's work things out together .. love you lots :)
i wanna to change my template ummm.. gotta to tink abt it le.. oppz haha. i wanna to be a changed person lol. yah .. dunnoe. suddenly i feel like studying lol. den mc so long le. ydae took out my chem lecture notes(got them from wen.thanks) den i look at it blur man. jialat. bad start. once i'm done with my chicken pox.. i'm gonna go back to mj n strive hard manz. =p get everything that i dun understand clear lol. since he's gonna enjoy his time at innove den i'll enjoy mine at meridian lol. oh forgot to mention my cg is 05s103. i'm taking double maths double sci by the way. everybod thinks i'm crazee.. but yah who cares haha. i happy can liaoz. drop den drop lol. oppz. oh haben met my cg mates la. haha. but heard from henry lots of anglican pple. thats good.. *happies* hmm. henry is in there.brenda is olso there. oppz i dunnoe already. nvm. thats bad. haha. wonder who's my ct too.. hmm.. hopefully she/he's really nice lol. yeah manz. *ar-bish* i'm tinking too much. bleah. i haben got my timetable .. hmph! =p gotta get from ct lol. so sianz haha. nvm. not my fault to get chicken pox at this time of day one lol. tsktsk. kie. i'm goin to grab breakfast haha. i'm fine kie. but i miss him la. oppz. =p
i wanna to change my template ummm.. gotta to tink abt it le.. oppz haha. i wanna to be a changed person lol. yah .. dunnoe. suddenly i feel like studying lol. den mc so long le. ydae took out my chem lecture notes(got them from wen.thanks) den i look at it blur man. jialat. bad start. once i'm done with my chicken pox.. i'm gonna go back to mj n strive hard manz. =p get everything that i dun understand clear lol. since he's gonna enjoy his time at innove den i'll enjoy mine at meridian lol. oh forgot to mention my cg is 05s103. i'm taking double maths double sci by the way. everybod thinks i'm crazee.. but yah who cares haha. i happy can liaoz. drop den drop lol. oppz. oh haben met my cg mates la. haha. but heard from henry lots of anglican pple. thats good.. *happies* hmm. henry is in there.brenda is olso there. oppz i dunnoe already. nvm. thats bad. haha. wonder who's my ct too.. hmm.. hopefully she/he's really nice lol. yeah manz. *ar-bish* i'm tinking too much. bleah. i haben got my timetable .. hmph! =p gotta get from ct lol. so sianz haha. nvm. not my fault to get chicken pox at this time of day one lol. tsktsk. kie. i'm goin to grab breakfast haha. i'm fine kie. but i miss him la. oppz. =p
--lemme be your guardian angel--
9:42 AM
9:42 AM
Friday, January 14, 2005
k..i thot this thru =p i'm not goin to regret this la. dun worry pple. fiona is fine lolz. haha. she have her downs at times one lah. but for now onwards she's onli goin to stay happy! =p she's refreshed le =p haha she's tired n had enough. she's goin to move on.. actuali is dun haf a choice la. =p haha. tsktsk. thanks to everyone who cares. thanks to yi jie who always pei me when i
m ultra down n sad.. haha. able to tolerate me. although i always tend to find her at the wrong times one. oppz. but i still love her *huggies* thanks mel who i'm talking to rite now olso .=p move on girl i can do it you can olso. haha. really thank her for being there when i need. listening to me when i'm a bit siao lah.*muackz* thanks to jason who always manage to cheer me up. dunoe why i always tend to tear in front of him one yet he dun mind. his work stress very big le. yet he still cares for me lotz. muz take care okie. *huggiesz* thanks to jo for helping me so much .. haha. you realli very nice.. blur blur one.. but thanks man. you really brighten my day. haha. thanks to tim thong. =p haha. though i dunnoe you that well lah. but it's realli nice chatting with you lol. i learnt a lot. oh yah. thanks for ydae "entertainment" wor. haha. realli had fun. enjoyed my self. feeling much better le.. last of all. thank tim-rong hui. haha. for bringing colour into my life la. i'll not forget you one. realli. =p the memories are there to stay. thats all i haf now yet i'm contented. i wanna you to stay happy okie. love you. *muackz* hmmm.. still got! thank GOD!! =p for tiding me thru this period of time lol. realli i koe you're always there for me. n the challenges that you gave me are always within my means one. thanks. so much thanks to everyone. realli who have helped me one or another. i'm gonna to love myself more lol. yah. after this chicken pox hol. i'm gonna to move into a new chapter of my life. *pat pat*
m ultra down n sad.. haha. able to tolerate me. although i always tend to find her at the wrong times one. oppz. but i still love her *huggies* thanks mel who i'm talking to rite now olso .=p move on girl i can do it you can olso. haha. really thank her for being there when i need. listening to me when i'm a bit siao lah.*muackz* thanks to jason who always manage to cheer me up. dunoe why i always tend to tear in front of him one yet he dun mind. his work stress very big le. yet he still cares for me lotz. muz take care okie. *huggiesz* thanks to jo for helping me so much .. haha. you realli very nice.. blur blur one.. but thanks man. you really brighten my day. haha. thanks to tim thong. =p haha. though i dunnoe you that well lah. but it's realli nice chatting with you lol. i learnt a lot. oh yah. thanks for ydae "entertainment" wor. haha. realli had fun. enjoyed my self. feeling much better le.. last of all. thank tim-rong hui. haha. for bringing colour into my life la. i'll not forget you one. realli. =p the memories are there to stay. thats all i haf now yet i'm contented. i wanna you to stay happy okie. love you. *muackz* hmmm.. still got! thank GOD!! =p for tiding me thru this period of time lol. realli i koe you're always there for me. n the challenges that you gave me are always within my means one. thanks. so much thanks to everyone. realli who have helped me one or another. i'm gonna to love myself more lol. yah. after this chicken pox hol. i'm gonna to move into a new chapter of my life. *pat pat*
--lemme be your guardian angel--
9:31 AM
9:31 AM
Thursday, January 13, 2005
duno if i'm doing the rite thing..
i reli duno wad to do now..
i feel so lost without you..
why do u choose to forsake me..?
do u reli not want me anymore..?
cant we be back as wad w were..?
i feel so hurt..why are u owaes doing this to me..
no matter wad i still love you..
i reli duno wad to do now..
i feel so lost without you..
why do u choose to forsake me..?
do u reli not want me anymore..?
cant we be back as wad w were..?
i feel so hurt..why are u owaes doing this to me..
no matter wad i still love you..
--lemme be your guardian angel--
11:20 PM
11:20 PM
um. haha. i dunnoe wad i'm doin la. blogging twice in one day.. can see i'm realli bored ba.. haha =p kie. everyone ask me to forget .. but the point is i kant .. hai.. main prob here is that my heart says i wanna to hold on lol.. haiz.. why muz things turn to such an extent.. why kant you gimme another chance again? i hate this feeling of having to smile n put on a strong front when deep down inside i'm not at all. i'm H.U.R.T.. n the onli soultion to it is YOU.. i dunnoe.. why are you able to move on that easily.. why are you able to accept everything in your path.. why you dun fight back? why are you able to let go everything n make more wonderful friends. tell me wad did i do wrong n i'll change. i dun wanna to treat like nothing has happen.
I have finally understood.
I have finally realized.
I have finally let go.
I have finally released all my hopes.
I have grown to accept the 300 days which i've cried over you.
Never will i allow my heart to be torn into pieces again.
I'll put all these behind a door, but i'll never shut itCoz its still part of me.
It still belongs to me.
Tears welded in my eyes but they never flowed down.
I guess this has stopped my never ending hope in search of you.
NO!! I'll kant do so..I'll really try..
I have finally understood.
I have finally realized.
I have finally let go.
I have finally released all my hopes.
I have grown to accept the 300 days which i've cried over you.
Never will i allow my heart to be torn into pieces again.
I'll put all these behind a door, but i'll never shut itCoz its still part of me.
It still belongs to me.
Tears welded in my eyes but they never flowed down.
I guess this has stopped my never ending hope in search of you.
NO!! I'll kant do so..I'll really try..
--lemme be your guardian angel--
5:18 PM
5:18 PM
heh. i'm lost. i'm not k.haiz. sad case. pple who are wondering why this stupid silly gurl is at home. i'll tell you why. coz she's down with chicken pox. n suddenly she hates chicken. hah. um. n the reason why she's awake so early when she's supposed to be sick b'cos she kant seem to sleep.. lacking of sleeping lol. coz of stupid thoughts running ard in her mind. she wanna to be strong n move one. to let go n forget. to not let her dearest yi jie worry yet she kant. he still means a lot to her. thats why. n she's feelin very lost.
managed to talk to him so yah. thot it was a good sign found out a lot that i didnt expect to know. firstly.i'm the main culprit who made his mum confiscate his phone. k my fault haiz. n his mum hates me? so why am i supposed to do. haiz. secondly he's giving up evrything including everything he had been working hard for in church? heh. i really didnt expect that this relationship will be such a big impact on him lol. haiz. i dunnoe now he wanna to give up everything. start from scratch. i dunno. i dun have a choice. i onli can wait till he's ready again? but i seriously doubt i'll stand another chance. funnie ah. that relationship onli lasted for one month n eighteen days yet the aftermath is so strong. haiz. so long le. i still kant learn to let go at the right time lol. *ar-bish*
managed to talk to him so yah. thot it was a good sign found out a lot that i didnt expect to know. firstly.i'm the main culprit who made his mum confiscate his phone. k my fault haiz. n his mum hates me? so why am i supposed to do. haiz. secondly he's giving up evrything including everything he had been working hard for in church? heh. i really didnt expect that this relationship will be such a big impact on him lol. haiz. i dunnoe now he wanna to give up everything. start from scratch. i dunno. i dun have a choice. i onli can wait till he's ready again? but i seriously doubt i'll stand another chance. funnie ah. that relationship onli lasted for one month n eighteen days yet the aftermath is so strong. haiz. so long le. i still kant learn to let go at the right time lol. *ar-bish*
--lemme be your guardian angel--
8:59 AM
8:59 AM
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
No matter how much I miss you,
or how much I hope to see you again,
I know it'll never come true.
You used to speak not-so-nice hokkien words over the phone.
But you made the words your own and made them sound hilarious.
You changed some words and added some of your own.
No matter how many times I wanted you to repeat the phrase,
You would just do it.
I really am at a lost whenever I think of you.
Why didnt I treasure you?
Where have you gone to?
Where are you now?
But I know I'll never get to hear from you again.
I just know it.
or how much I hope to see you again,
I know it'll never come true.
You used to speak not-so-nice hokkien words over the phone.
But you made the words your own and made them sound hilarious.
You changed some words and added some of your own.
No matter how many times I wanted you to repeat the phrase,
You would just do it.
I really am at a lost whenever I think of you.
Why didnt I treasure you?
Where have you gone to?
Where are you now?
But I know I'll never get to hear from you again.
I just know it.
--lemme be your guardian angel--
7:17 PM
7:17 PM
um. so fast already 2005.. i olso very very long nve blog already lol.. sianz.. haiz.. so many things happen.. from being jobless so now working at rotiboy happily.. from being attached to being unattached yet waiting now.. hai hai.. dunnoe lahz.. so many thing happening at the same time .. *stress* wonder how i manage to overcome all that lol..
hmm.. i'm working at rotiboy parkway.. haha.. very fun job there.. now working n studying at the same time.. i'm officially a mjc student for first 3 months.. oppz.. forgot to mention that ah.. heh. VEGA 5 rocks! heh. we got secong for orientation wor! as in my house VEGA la.. hehe. yeah man. had a lot of fun.. really thank GOD for letting me have so many fun den didnt had much time to ponder over *ahem*
oh yah.i'm unattached now. hai. long story lol. but in short parental objection. i dun wanna go thru everyhting again. i'm already close to tears liaoz. hai hai. why muz liddat one. but nvm. i'll wait.. 5 years lol. yeah manz. i can make it de.. i'm hopig n praying that his faith wont die too. if he ever sees this la. haiz. gimme a call or sms will you? hai. i realli miss you like crazee..
heh. i;m olso down with chicken pox. whoever that's reading this dun laugh k. hmph. haiz. already so sad case liaoz lol. now sit at home will start to tink abt stupid stuff lah. hai hai. but yah. chicken pox no fun de wad olso cannot eat den hoh. i look like alien!! =x -stress-
hmm.. i'm working at rotiboy parkway.. haha.. very fun job there.. now working n studying at the same time.. i'm officially a mjc student for first 3 months.. oppz.. forgot to mention that ah.. heh. VEGA 5 rocks! heh. we got secong for orientation wor! as in my house VEGA la.. hehe. yeah man. had a lot of fun.. really thank GOD for letting me have so many fun den didnt had much time to ponder over *ahem*
oh yah.i'm unattached now. hai. long story lol. but in short parental objection. i dun wanna go thru everyhting again. i'm already close to tears liaoz. hai hai. why muz liddat one. but nvm. i'll wait.. 5 years lol. yeah manz. i can make it de.. i'm hopig n praying that his faith wont die too. if he ever sees this la. haiz. gimme a call or sms will you? hai. i realli miss you like crazee..
heh. i;m olso down with chicken pox. whoever that's reading this dun laugh k. hmph. haiz. already so sad case liaoz lol. now sit at home will start to tink abt stupid stuff lah. hai hai. but yah. chicken pox no fun de wad olso cannot eat den hoh. i look like alien!! =x -stress-
--lemme be your guardian angel--
6:55 PM
6:55 PM